Monthly Archives: June 2013

My Favorite Tony Soprano Moments

By now everything that’s needed to be said has been said about the super awful passing of actor James Gandolfini at the age of 51. Lots of people die every day, heck lots of actors die every day, but for … Continue reading

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Remind Me Never To Go to Egypt With Bert

I’m not claustrophobic generally speaking, but one of my biggest fears is being stuck in the bottom of the great Egyptian pyramids. And you know WHY I am afraid? Because I’m terrified of dead mummies? Because I hate the heat? … Continue reading

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I Want Love, And So Does Robert Downey, Jr.

Me and Robert Downey, Jr. have SO much in common. We are both recovering addicts (him, drugs; me, the tv show Intervention) and we’re both really good-looking. We also both want love. Well, at least Robert did in 2001. Allow me … Continue reading

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Fill in the Blank: Salma Hayek’s Husband Loves __________

If you said . . . Her bubbly personality, you are incorrect. If you answered her excellent belly-dancing amongst vampires, you’d be wrong again. If you guessed her amazing laugh, you are misinformed. Nope, what Salma Hayek’s billionaire husband François-Henri Pinault … Continue reading

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It May Be June, But It’s January Who Is Turning a New Leaf

Today we have our latest inductee for the “And Not a Single F— Was Given” Hall of Fame. January Jones got bangs. Truth be told, I actually DO give a f—. Oh boy. See, I kind of dig her hair, … Continue reading

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Jurassic Park is 20 Today.

Do you hear me humming? Da da daaa da da, da da daaa da da, da da da, da da da, dada daaa da da? What is that tune, you ask? HEATHENS, all of you. IT IS THE JURASSIC PARK THEME … Continue reading

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America’s Second Favorite Lesbian is Back on the Market!

Hello my Sapphic disciples! I have some good news–sort of. Everyone’s favorite lesbian–besides Ellen–is available! That’s right–Jane Lynch is now free to date you! I shouldn’t sound so full of glee–after all Lynch is only single because she is getting … Continue reading

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It Is So Hard To Meet a Man in New York, I’d Even Date a Teeny Little Super Guy!

Everyone knows the New York City dating scene is really and truly designed for single women in their 30s. It is AMAZING how easy it is to find a man who wants to settle down and get married RIGHT AWAY. … Continue reading

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So Long, Intervention!

Okay, it’s been a couple of weeks since A&E announced that they were canceling Intervention after 13 awesome seasons, and I have been in such deep mourning that I have not been able to bring myself to accept it let … Continue reading

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Brad Pitt’s Best Years Were With Aniston, Not Angelina.

Hi kidz. Wow, this headline is probably the most controversial statement I have EVER written. But it is the truth. Brad Pitt today is one of the most sanctimonious, boring, smug people on EARTH. Heck, probably in the whole galaxy. … Continue reading

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