Monthly Archives: July 2014

Tori Spelling Has Been the Worst Since 1996, According to Me

I am such a great person today, that I bet you all wonder if I was always so great. The answer is yes. Of course I was. Duh. In addition to being great for the past million years, I’ve also been … Continue reading

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Send me to Azkaban, Please

So, here’s the thing. I love you all very much, but I’m kind of a popular person. People at work need me at work. My pizza place needs me to buy pizza. My bed needs me to lie in it. You … Continue reading

Posted in Happy Birthday! | Tagged | 1 Comment

Joe and Sofia are Dating, Maybe

Well, Joe Manganiello got over me not wanting to date him real fast. Last night People Magazine announced that the part Sicilian, part werewolf actor might be dating newly single Sofia Vergara, who recently split from her douche bag fiance … Continue reading

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Joe Manganiello and I Will Probably Never Date

Poor Joe Manganiello, the guy who plays the werewolf Alcide on True Blood. He will probably never get to date me. Granted, there are many reasons why he SHOULD date me. We’re both Catholic. I’m age appropriate for him. I know how … Continue reading

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