Monthly Archives: October 2012

Of Course They Make The Nerd Sister From Modern Family Talk About School!

I got glasses for the first time twenty years ago when I was, er, 4. That’s right. 4. (Okay, I was actually 13, but whatevs). “Glasses will make you look smart,” my mom told me. Well, gee, thanks. I AM … Continue reading

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What? You Want MORE Peter from the Cosby Show? Okay then!

Two months ago, I thought I found Rudy’s friend Peter from the The Cosby Show on an episode of Louie. Alas–it was not him–but apparently I am not the only person obsessed with the adorable chubby silent type as the post … Continue reading

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Pour Some Crystal Gravy on Me!

So yesterday I talked about how much I would love to chug a bottle of Schmitts Gay on a hot summer day. Today, I would prefer dousing my mashed potatoes in Crystal Gravy! Again, I can’t actually post the video, … Continue reading

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So I Guess There Will Be No Sangoria!

Boo F—ing Hoo. Mark Sanchez and Eva Longoria have broken up. And I had just declared him the best QB in the Pats vs the Jets! I mean, Tom Brady is way better, but Mark is the bigger stud! And … Continue reading

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Please Hide Under a Rock, LeAnn Rimes, and Take Your Twitter Account With You

LeAnn Rimes is at it again. After one million bikini photos, several Twitter wars, a 30th birthday where she boasted how AMAZING HER LIFE IS, and rehab for “stress,” the bitch is trying to get our sympathy AGAIN. This Thursday … Continue reading

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My Mom Loved Me Enough to Get Me the Fraggle Rock Books

My mom was pretty cool back in the day. Sure, she didn’t buy me Lunchables or let me drink Capri Suns–we were an Ecto Cooler Family–but she DID order me the Fraggle Rock  Book Series!   Fraggle Rock was in … Continue reading

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Greatest Fake Commercial Ever: Schmitts Gay

Who the hell knew Adam Sandler was so progressive? I mean, he and Chris Farley, may he rest in peace, starred in one of my all time favorite commercials for gay beer on Saturday Night Live in 1991! Schmitts Gay! … Continue reading

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Stop the Presses: A Hollywood Starlet Dyed Her Hair!

Well color me SHOCKED! A young actress dyed her hair red! Ashley Greene–who I only know as a girl who once dated Joe Jonas, and only because I read People Magazine–but apparently also stars in the Twilight series, recently switched the hue … Continue reading

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The Pats versus The Jets: Quarterbacks

Okay, the Pats are playing the Jets AS WE SPEAK. And by we I mean I, but whatevs. Earlier today I compared the coaches of the two teams, Bill Belichick and Rex Ryan. Now I am going to analyze the … Continue reading

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The Patriots versus the Jets: the REAL Battle

Okay, I am excited because today my hometown team the New England Patriots are playing the New York Jets which means the game will be on tv in New York (where I live) and I won’t have to check NFL.com … Continue reading

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