You always hear people say 50 (or 60, 55, 40, 35, 33, etc) is the new 30. Look at Demi Moore! Look at Cindy Crawford! Look at a bunch of beautiful women who made their career being beautiful women look beautiful! How shocking that they look good!

This is the Demi I will always love. Say ditto if you agree.

But then there is the other school of young ladies who want to look old.

For example, 18-year-old Courtney Stodden aspires to be a washed up 45-year-old Vegas cocktail waitress–off the strip, of course–who calls all her customers “dolls” when she’s not off smoking Newports.

Made in a plastic surgeon’s office in America!

20-year-old Selena Gomez takes her style cues from 53-year-old Marie Osmond.

Yup.

And let’s not forget the grand name of aging prematurely, our home girl Lindsay Lohan. Just 26, she embodies what an Oompa Loompa would look like as a bottle blonde female in the 21st Century.

To be fair, those cheek implants are probably young.

Me? I don’t care how old I look (though it’s 25, if you’re wondering) as long as I can always be young at heart.

Weeeee!