Santa’s Little Helper Is the Only Racer I Care About

It’s My Lucky Day! As we prepare for the Lines Of Battle, I am preparing for a Giant Finish. Let’s not Overanalyze it–after all, it’s not the Normandy Invasion! Nope, today is the Kentucky Derby! I don’t even need to cross over the Verrazano to watch it!

Horses!

Horses!

As I sip on my mint julep, I am reminded of another race that didn’t end quite so well. The year was 1989, the town was Springfield. Homer Simpson needed money for Christmas presents, so he did what any logical man would do: He went to the track. He placed all of his money on a greyhound named Santa’s Little Helper who ended up losing.

homer-doh-squarered

Santa’s owner was also upset, so he abandoned him outside the track. Homer and Bart took him home. Talk about a Golden Soul!

 

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