I bet when you read the first four words of this headline you got SO excited. You were all, where IS Carmen Sandiego? I haven’t seen that international criminal mastermind in a WHILE.

Neither has Rockapella!

I fooled you, huh, just like Carmen has long fooled the ACME Detective Agency. See, I’m talking about the original big girl on television, the Melissa McCarthy of her day, Camryn Manheim.

As a lawyer on The Practice, she might have defended Carmen at some point.

Carmen was EVERYWHERE in the late 1990s. She was the token big girl, and boy did they shove it down our throats. After winning an Emmy for her work on The Practice, she proclaimed, “This is for all the fat girls!” Not enough for you? She wrote and performed in a one-woman show titled, wait for it, Wake Up, I’m Fat! which was followed by her memoirs by the same title. Okay Camryn we get it! You’re fat!!!

Don’t get me wrong–I am totally on board with showcasing all sizes on the boob tube. It was just the smugness of the whole Hollywood machine that annoyed me. “See!” the powerful Hollywood bigwigs seemed to say, “We’re so accepting of ALL SIZES that we’ll give Camryn an Emmy. But that means that her costar Lara Flynn Boyle can never eat again.” Puke.

Since The Practice ended in 2004, I haven’t seen Camryn around much. Apparently she was on Ghost Whisperer and Harry’s Law, but did anyone watch either of those shows? I must confess I did enjoy her as Nurse Daly in the 2010 Lifetime movie The Pregnancy Pact, but other than that she has been absent from my life. I guess she is content with passing on the torch to Melissa McCarthy.

And for all of you are really craving some Rockapella, here you go!