All right, you’re probably all, Liz, I thought this was the sexiest Olympians of all time. Where are the archers? Where are the badminton players? While, sure, I do agree that Rajiv Ouseph hits the birdie WAY over the hotness net, it’s still the swimmers who I want to dunk me in the pool.

Are you aiming the birdie for my heart, Ravi?

So with that I declare Australian swimmer Ian Thorpe the third hottest Olympian of all time.

Thorpe, Australian for hot babe.

I first encountered the Thorpedo on my tv screen in 2000, when he was a mere 17-year-old competing in the Sydney Olympics. It wasn’t THAT dirty because I myself was a mere 21-year-old college student. While I was at the library studying, I would record the Olympics on my VCR and watch his races when I returned to my dorm room past midnight. I’d park my ass in my beach chair and drink a beer while thinking treasonous thoughts. As much as I loved American swimmers, I loved the young Thorpe more. Just hang me now for being a traitor!

Thorpe captured three golds and two silvers in 2000, and then two golds, a silver and a bronze in 2004. And then he retired, made a few attempted comebacks, and now he’s just busy being sexy. Tough life! But hey, if he ever needs a green card he can reach out to me!