Don’t you just love stars? When they get tired of life, they check into rehab for exhaustion and coping mechanisms. When they get bored with sleeping with Jennifer Aniston, they jump ship to Angelina Jolie. And when they have a baby and need to lose the weight, they become a Weight Watcher spokesperson!  Stars, they’re just like us!

These must be the famous Double Ds that Joe Simpson loves so much–except now they’re like Triple Fs–and NO you can’t cover those suckers up!

I of course I’m referring to one-time virgin/sexual napalm Jessica Simpson, who recently gave birth to a cute baby girl Maxwell Drew with fiance Eric Johnson. Mazel tov! And now, four months later, it’s time to focus and GET SKINNY, STAT! And look, Jessica Simpson is doing JUST THAT, just like a normal person. Stars, they’re just like us!

EXCEPT that they’re not. On people.com today, Jessica’s trainer tells us how she’s getting in shape. Um . . . she hired a trainer, that’s how she did it. She has a multi-million dollar endorsement hanging over her head, that’s how she did it. Sheesh, that wasn’t hard to figure out was it.

I’ve never been pregnant though I HAVE been a Weight Watcher for the past eleven years. I can only imagine the pressure and difficulty it can be in losing the weight. At the same time, who the hell cares? You got a beautiful baby! Be happy and love your baby-making body! Okay/end feminist rant.