Ugh, I admit even I don’t like to make fun of people under 18. But come ON-stop trying to make me care about Ireland Baldwin, 17, because IT WON’T HAPPEN.

Ireland the country, on the other hand, yes.

Honest to God, home girl’s publicist has been working HARD for her money because over the past few months Ireland has made people.com for the following important reasons:

She wants to dye her hair lavender.

Her boyfriend is her bestie.

She’s wearing a ring! What does it mean???

She wants to be the Lance Armstrong of models, pre-assholeness.

Yes, this thoughtless little pig (what, too soon?) is pretty, but she’s a f—ing 17-year-old model, the daughter of two rich, famous, and crazy people. TOTALLY relatable. Except not at all.

What, you expected a sexy pic? F— no, I don’t want to get in a twitter war with Alec.

Well, on the plus side at least she doesn’t call anyone a “toxic little queen” like her papa Alec!