Ahhhh, look at the hippo! He is so adorable! I just want to squeeze his cheeks and become his best friend in the whole wide world. The only issue, howevs, is that he is going to grow up to be this:
Wow, that’s a hungry hungry hippo if I ever saw one. And I bet you anything, he’s NOT eating marbles.
For proof, we can ask a real life man, travel guide Paul Templer, who was attacked by a hippo in Africa back in 1996. Ouch! Luckily he survived, but he did lose an arm. Ouch again!
And why is this relevant 17 years after the incident? Well, homeboy wrote a book! It’s called What’s Left Of Me and Paul assures us that there are “No immunizations required” while you read. Zing!
I still think that hippos rock, though.