I feel guilty about quite a few things . . . google stalking my crushes, microwaving Peeps to watch them explode (where is PETA???), thinking Jamie Bell was hot when he starred as Billy Elliot at age 13 . . . .

What can I say? I recognized the potential.

But perhaps what I feel the absolute WORST about is when I read an article about a child of a goddamn celebrity, and I actually have an opinion on it. Egads.

The latest example of this is, well, quite an important step in the beauty world. Suri Cruise got bangs. Yup, you heard it here first (or second, if you read the article on people.com as I did).

Such a vague stare and yet such blunt bangs.

Let’s be honest–and I know she’s just a kid–but home girl TOTALLY took the scissors to her own hair, which is something I also do after a few drinks when I decide I need a few snip snips. You’re in good company Suri.

Now I need to crawl under a rock because I am ashamed, so ashamed.