Happy Valentine’s Day everyone, or as I like to call it, Happy VD Day! Because if you’re single and alone as I am, you have very little chance of catching a sexually transmitted disease. Woohoo!

You also have little chance of getting murdered by your husband and being featured on an episode of Dateline with Keith Morrison.

As I eagerly await for candy to go 50% off tomorrow (Oh sh–, I get up sweets for Lent! Bummer!), I want to celebrate love TODAY. And what better way than to congratulate the ever so patient Starbucks customer and American Airlines flyer Alec Baldwin and his child bride Hilaria as they are expecting their first child together!

She’s a 20-something yoga instructor. I don’t get what he sees in her AT ALL.

In addition to collecting Emmys, Golden Globes, and SAG Awards for his work on 30 Rock, Baldwin was also designated “Father of the Year” back in 2007 (awarded by me) when he announced to the world, via voicemail, that his then 11-year-old daughter Ireland was a “rude, thoughtless little pig.” Dads, they’ll say the darnedest things!

But at least pigs are cute, right???

So mazel tov Alec and Hilaria! This baby will be super well loved, as long as s/he always calls Alec back.