Even though I am really young and beautiful, I am an old soul at heart. While I like hip shows such as Game of Thrones, Veep, The Killing, and Two and a Half Men (just want to see if you are paying attention!), I have a soft spot for anything made in the 1980s. Yes, Alf and Small Wonder, I am talking to you.

Wow, she looks like she is having fun. I thought robot little girls were supposed to be happy!

I am also talking about one of the greatest tv shows of all time that I unfortunately was never able to watch beyond the first commercial. Let’s play the pyramid so you can guess what I am talking about. JR . . . Shooting . . . Oil . . . Texas . . . blah blah blah. Yes, we are talking about Dallas. Dallas was my parents’ favorite show back in the day. It aired on Friday nights on CBS, alternating between 9 and 10pm over the years. As young children, my sister Katie and I were allowed to watch the opening credits and up to the first commercial. We felt so COOL. Of course we had no idea what was going on, but considering how strict our parents were this was the equivalent of watching a porno on the school bus on the way to CCD! My favorite moment of the ten minutes I was allowed to watch every week was the opening credits. Katie and I would cheer on the good guys (“Yeahhhhh!!!!) and jeer the bad guys (“Boooooo!!!!”). Sad thing is watching it now I can’t remember who was what, but I can tell you that Patrick Duffy was a fox!

Keep that shirt off and please never make a show about step families with that chick from Three’s Company.

I’m sure you’ve heard the news but in case you haven’t they’re remaking Dallas which will premiere on TNT on June 1. The good news is that Duffy and Larry Hagman are reprising their roles as brothers Bobby and J.R. Ewing, respectively, the bad news is that this show is happening, period. Bonus bad news is that Jesse Metcalfe will play Christopher Ewing, Bobby’s adopted son. His eyebrows are way too sculpted for me.

Oh, and yes, Bobby is still a bit of a fox. A silver fox, yes, but a fox just the same.

Don’t mind the salt and pepper that makes me a distinguished gentleman.