The other day I was talking to a friend. Let’s call her Louisa, because she lives in Brooklyn, and that sounds like the name of someone who lives in Brooklyn.
“So what did you do this weekend?” I asked.
“Oh, I read some David Foster Wallace, listened to NPR, rode my bike around Prospect Park, did my shift at the Coop. You know, the usual. You?”
“I watched about 15 hours of tv. That DVR won’t watch itself!”
“Oh, I wouldn’t know,” Louisa remarked as she chewed on a piece of kale. “I don’t even own a tv. Occasionally I watch episodes of Downton Abbey on my computer.”
Ugh, I want to groan. You are one of those people. The kind that are all, “Kardashian? Is that a dialect of the Elvish language in Lord of the Rings? Not that I’ve seen those movies or anything. I just read the books.”
You see, I’m a tv watcher. A fanatic really. I DVR 25 shows a week, and that’s not even counting the Golden Girls reruns I record as a palate cleanser when I watch something scary at night or the HBO shows I catch On Demand because they take up too much space. I am Facebook friends with the following tv, er, personalities: two Real Housewives’ HUSBANDS (Simon and Simon–van Kempen and Barney, the latter now an EX-ho’wife hubby!), Matt and Cory from Hoarders, Joe Millionaire, and in a measure of how low budget I can be–a brother of one of the interventionees from an episode of Intervention.
I love tv and am not afraid to admit it. And the advent of the DVR has made my viewing habits even more of an addiction. In the olden days, when you missed a show, you called up your friend and asked, “I heard at the salon that Bobby kissed Sue Ellen on Dallas last night??? What did J.R. do?” Now–you’d shoot that person at the salon for spoiling it for you because you haven’t watched it yet!
So please join me in this journey when we talk about what’s on and what’s recorded.
Till next time-